This photo above is from someone else who was referring to writing and how the character's flaws are opportunities to expand the storyline.
I like it for different reasons: it applies to each of us as well.
Someone said: " We have to live with our faults, flaws, mistakes. We can't leave if we don't like who we were, who we are, or who we're becoming. It's the ultimate marriage of self and our only option is to face our truths and learn to love who we are."
Part of that is facing things we've done that we've either shoved into the back of our mind or made an excuse for.
We're very good at that.
"Well yes I called Tammy a so & so, but someone had to say it. I was really just being a friend if you want the truth".
We can talk ourselves into justifying a lot, especially if it means we don't have to be wrong.
Why now? What brought this up?
Prayer.
See I've been reading and a wife's most important duty is prayer. The husband leads, he needs God to lead him, us wives are the support system. Our prayers bring God into the home, into hearts, open minds. Prayer is about humbling yourself, it's showing God that you trust him and you're giving yourself over to his will.
It's literally giving Jesus the wheel.
Problem.
You can't pray effectively if you can't admit your own flaws. You have to be able to ask God to clean your personal house before you ask him to clean up your spouse.
If you're hurt or angry, if you're dealing with your own guilt and troubles....it can cloud your vision.
Instead of asking God to open your spouses heart, or to teach him to love himself, you're asking God to change him or make him see things your way.
The only way prayer is effective is if you can come clean to God.
Talk about humbling.
It's a lot easier to just do a blanket prayer "forgive me for my sins" and call it good.
It's another to think about your sins and really come clean.
I am not who I was when I was young.
I am not even who I was a month ago.
I'm a work in progress.
And I have sinned.
I had sex out of marriage when I was 13 with a 21 year old. Yes I was young, under age, but I knew what I was doing. I was so desperate to have the love I couldn't find in myself that I opened myself up to a possibly dangerous situation. Worse, I deprived myself of being able to share a wonderful first time moment with my husband.
I lied to my parents.
I lied about the fact that I'd started smoking at 13.
I lied about how miserable I was.
I lied about how their problems were affecting me.
I lied about working overtime when I was really with Bill.
I lied and said I was donating a bag of clothes to charity when I was really leaving.
My son was born out of wedlock, and I was raped so I have no sin in that, but I kept him even though I knew I was in over my head. My sin was pride. I put my pride over my son's best interest.
Moreover, I deprived my mom of what should have been her blessing.
My son was a gift to her, the other son she prayed for in her heart that she couldn't have.
I lied to my husband about a dress I bought.
I've lied to my husband to cover for our daughter.
I've been judgemental, opinionated, stubborn, prideful, disrespectful.
I had a period of time when I turned to witchcraft and spiritualism instead of God.
I am a sinner.
And I am forgiven.
Hard as I try, I will sin again, probably in a fit of emotion.
And as long as I can face my sins and be sorry, see how I hurt others and myself, I will be forgiven.
And I will be better.
Character flaws are absolutely opportunities.
They're chances to grow, learn, change, open up, heal.
The truth hurts.
It's hard admitting you have moments that you just sucked at life.
Especially when you're like me and have a tendency to be hard on yourself anyway.
Guess what?
It feels good.
It's tough, it's the ultimate humbling experience to look at all the things you did really wrong and strip away all the excuses.
No more " but they said this" "she did that" "they made me feel _____".
It's not a reason.
It's a reaction.
And sometimes we chose the wrong one.
Every day is a new day, a new you waiting to be.
Don't waste it running from a past that can't be changed.
God loves you, he knows who you want to be, more importantly he knows who he wants you to be.
All you have to do is let go and grow.
God bless.
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